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Previous Episode

Listen to Audio

0:30

Originally broadcast April 16, 2005

Schadenfreude comes to you this week...IN REAL TIME!

If you think you can handle non-stop, heart-pumping action that defies convention and straps you in for a thrill-seeking joyride, then tune in for this explosive episode packed with suspense, gut-wrenching melodrama, and edge-of-your-seat hijinks and shenanigans!

And did we mention that this Chicago Public Radio comedy program flies hour-by-hour, minute-by-minute, second-by-second?!

Schadenfreude—IN REAL TIME!




Previous Shows

 
Listen to Audio Episode 61
61*

Originally broadcast August 27, 2005

We close our second season with a Chicago Concerns documentary about the breakup of Schadenfreude and subsequent attempts to reunite the cast.

The writers and performers went their separate ways after Episode 60, and Chicago Public Radio general manager Torey Malatia has dispatched one of his producers to track them down. A modern-day Blues Brothers, this episode takes us from Las Vegas to McHenry, Illinois, and from corporate America to the FBI—all in an attempt to get the band back together.

Schadenfreude—I thought it would make you laugh?

Special thanks to Chicago Public Radio's Torey Malatia and Amy (Dorn) Drozdowska-McGuire.

 

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  Episodes 59 and 60
The Bus Stops Here, Parts One and Two

Originally broadcast August 13, 2005

Special Guest: Chicago Tribune Columnist and WGN Radio Host Rick Kogan

In special, back-to-back episodes, we explore the campaign to reelect Fifty-third Ward Chicago alderman Ed Bus.

For the first time in thirty to thirty-five years, Alderman Bus has an opponent. Her name is Gretchen Ross-Stevenson, and her passion, education, corporate clout, media savvy, and—of course—money are giving Alderman Bus the challenge of his political life.

As told by Chicago Tribune columnist and WGN Radio host Rick Kogan, we follow the cast of characters on both sides as they all do whatever it takes to win the hearts of Fifty-third Ward voters. So join us as we shine a comedic light on the Chicago political landscape that's been affectionately coined, “The Machine.”

Schadenfreude—It's Bus for Us, and Don't Forget to Vote Daley.

Special thanks to Chicago Public Radio's Steve Edwards, Gretchen Helfrich, Carlos Hernandez Gomez, Melba Lara, and Dave McGuire.

Listen to Audio Listen to the Entire Presentation
Listen to Audio Listen to Part One
Listen to Audio Listen to Part Two

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 58
1947 Argyle Street

Originally broadcast July 23, 2005

We've procrastinated for six months, and our novel is due tomorrow. It's imperative that we lock ourselves in our apartment and concentrate. But our neighbors won't leave us alone.

From the noisy bachelor and the elderly recluse to the alarmist building manager and the gossip hound, 1947 West Argyle is a mirror for apartment-dwelling in any city. So join us as we explore our building, criss-crossing from one unit to the next, observing the hijinks and shenanigans that distract and deter us from living our own lives.

Schadenfreude—could you please keep it down?!

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 57
Schadenfreude Es Muy Loco

Originally broadcast July 2, 2005

If we can make people laugh in one language, then what about two? We set out to prove that comedy is the universal tongue by adding some bilingual spice to our show.

Spanish-language radio draws more than a million listeners in our market, and we've decided that it's the fool-proof path to higher ratings. So tune in this week and follow along in two separate languages.

Schadenfreude—Loco Pantalones...NO!!!

Special thanks to Roxana Hadad, Chicago Public Radio's Carlos Hernandez Gomez, and our production assistant, Michael Schwartz.

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 56
Who's Your Biggest Fan?

Originally broadcast June 25, 2005

Have you ever cheered for something so loudly that you lost your voice? Waited in line for over an hour to see your favorite movie? Taken your shirt off at a sporting event? Then you, my friend, may be a fanatic.

This week, we explore different facets of fanaticism with a trip to the newly-renamed Dinerbanski and Ross Convention Center. There we find a comicon, where you can get signed press shots, bootleg videos, and head lice from all your favorite B-list celebrities. We also stop by a pompon competition, where Rich White High School's Zoe Dunkel gets her big shot at stardom. Plus, we get a glimpse into the obsessions of super CEO Ted Dinerbanski and meet Lynard, the irrepressibly meek owner of a strip mall record store.

Schadenfreude—did you know that David Lee Roth is an EMT?

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 55
Twin Arches: Who Killed Scruffy McMuffin?

Originally broadcast June 18, 2005

We send federal agent Dick Proover to the small town of McDonaldland to investigate the murder of former Mickey D mascot Scruffy McMuffin. And Agent Proover quickly discovers that there's more to this crime than mere egg and bread.

Everyone in McDonaldland had a motive, and everyone is a suspect. But is the sneakiest secret lurking beneath the Hamburgler slide and the ball pits of McDonaldland Playland?

Is the question, “Who killed Scruffy?”

Or is it “What killed...?,” “When...?,” or “Where...?”

Schadenfreude—it's a Twin Peaks parody.

Special thanks to Ronnie Davis.

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 54
Two People Walk into a Bar

Originally broadcast June 11, 2005

Join Schadenfreude already in progress, as we bring you more comedic commentary and dialogue about the world around us. We may not be the first to comment on Lance Armstrong's bracelets, low-carb beer, Jason Bateman, Buddhism, Mom's birthday, one-hit wonders, cancer, thalidomide, iPods, Jenny Jones, WhiteSox.com, or a Guiltatarian society...but we are the first to do it using sports analogies.

Schadenfreude—are you two ready to order?

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 53
He Didn't Start the Fire

Originally broadcast June 4, 2005

Once upon a time, there was a cow. This week, we open our minds and textbooks to find the true culprit behind the Great Chicago Fire. Was it Mrs. O'Leary's cow? Shifting winds? Duraflame account rep Todd Voorhies? Wait...which fire are we talking about?

Plus, progressive high school teacher Jett Craig sets fire to the status quo, a desperate couple tries to reignite their long-lost fire via their record collection, and fourteen-year-old Zoe Dunkle lights a fire under her new rap posse, the Hog Butchaz.

Schadenfreude—yeah-hah! Probably a cow did it.

Special thanks to Sylvia Ewing and Ronnie Davis.

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 52
The Teachers' Lounge

Originally broadcast May 28, 2005

Joined by an audience in Chicago Public Radio's performance studio, we go behind the scenes of America's number two-ranked high school: Rich White High.

We uncover chaos, conflict, and crushes. And we take our microphones where no microphone has gone before—the teachers' lounge. From emergency staff meetings to driver's ed to drama class, it's about time someone scrutinized the adults behind this award-winning institution.

Schadenfreude—can somebody call my mom?

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 51
A Day in the Life of America's Heart and Soul

Originally broadcast May 14, 2005

This week, Schadenfreude goes gonzo, bringing you a special radio edition of Academy Award winner Angelina Jolie's pet project, A Day in the Life of America's Heart and Soul.

We wanted to help Ms. Jolie get a better sense of how non-celebrities live. So we saved up our money and sent audio kits to random Midwesterners, asking them to document their “average,” “boring,” “flyover” lives. We heard back from J. Marvin Vitner, heir to the Vitner snack food fortune; from all-purpose entertainment legend Doug E. Crazy and his Funseeekers; and from Lefty gadfly Folkman Jack.

So tune in to hear the unfulfilled hopes and dreams of uninspiring, low-life, soulless people...plus some profound celebrity insight from Angelina Jolie!

Schadenfreude—is this thing on?

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 50
Jade to Black

Originally broadcast May 7, 2005

Remember when you had a crush on the closed circuit campus radio deejay who'd play your favorite Dinosaur Jr. or Spin Doctors song? Or maybe you were one of the lucky few who were given a weeknight graveyard shift to share your unique CD collection, which had Neil Young and the Pulp Fiction soundtrack.

Join Schadenfreude this week as we celebrate our 50th episode by reliving our college radio days. But instead of playing Green Day, we spin some of our favorite sketches from Season Two.

Schadenfreude—relax...chill...and just Jade...to black.

Special thanks to Vanessa Harris.

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 49
Live from Red Rocks!...I Mean, Red Bricks

Originally broadcast April 30, 2005

Schadenfreude comes to you live once again from the Metropolis Performing Arts Centre in Arlington Heights, Illinois!

We spend some time with CEO Ted Dinerbanski of tax and audit leviathan Dinerbanski and Ross, visit Glenbrook North High School freshman Zoe Dunkle as she patiently waits for her Spring Fling date at the neighborhood Jiffy Lube, and learn what happens if you leave your house unlocked during a full moon.

Schadenfreude—did you know that David Lee Roth is an EMT?

Special thanks to Corey Harrison, Joe Mohamed, Mike Wagner, Tim Rater, and the rest of the Metropolis Performing Arts Centre staff.

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 48
Speed-dating

Originally broadcast April 23, 2005

Schadenfreude quickens the pace this week and explores our cultural fascination with all things fast. Ready? And...go!

These days, our need for speed is as patriotic as apple pie, and Schadenfreude doesn't want to be labeled a terrorist. So in this episode, every scene is under two minutes long. Eavesdrop on a relationship crisis at the Phudie Mart grocery store; ride along with the crew of the hit TV show, Cheaters; and look for your soul mate at the Schadenfreude Speedy Date and Bowl.

Schadenfreude—twice the fun, twice as fast.

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 47
0:30

Originally broadcast April 16, 2005

Schadenfreude comes to you this week...IN REAL TIME! If you think you can handle non-stop, heart-pumping action that defies convention and straps you in for a thrill-seeking joyride, then tune in for this explosive episode packed with suspense, gut-wrenching melodrama, and edge-of-your-seat hijinks and shenanigans!

And did we mention that this Chicago Public Radio comedy program flies hour-by-hour, minute-by-minute, second-by-second?!

Schadenfreude—IN REAL TIME!

 

Back to top >>

   
Listen to Audio Episode 45
Can I Crash Here?

Originally broadcast March 26, 2005

Schadenfreude is going to be in town for a few days this week, and we're wondering if we can crash at your place. Please? Just for one night?

In return, we promise to help yuppies Barry and Brittany learn the history of their condo, get the answers to life's more difficult questions from dorm hall director Mr. Rasden, and glean some relationship wisdom from French chanteuse Shi Shi Renault.

Schadenfreude—did somebody order Thai food?

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 44
You Love It If We Fly

Originally broadcast March 19, 2005

If you fly, you will be delayed. That seems to be a new fact of life, as the FAA estimates that twenty-five percent of flights experience some sort of hold-up.

So how do you deal with it? Do you curse out the flight attendant? Get drunk at Fox Sports Bar? Have lunch with five-time Academy Award nominee Warren Beatty? This week, wait with Schadenfreude as we suffer through yet another airport delay.

Schadenfreude—You love it if we fly.

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 43
Schadenfreude Night Ministry

Originally broadcast March 12, 2005

Can I get a witness!

Come one, come all to the corner of Desperation and Hungry as Schadenfreude conducts a religious revival from their night ministry bus.

Will confessing their sins to a priest help Susan and Jaime find renewed faith in their marriage? Can Jack Chick's zealous comic books be successfully reinterpreted for the theatrical stage? Is it possible to gain inner peace through the late-night talk show, Love Notes? And does Dr. Phil's miracle diet really work?

Tune in to attain nirvana. And also learn what happens when Nimby moves into your neighborhood!

Schadenfreude—not in our backyard!

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 42
Ask Me About Pulaski!

Originally broadcast March 5, 2005

Live from Chicago Public Radio's performance studio on Navy Pier, Schadenfreude presents a tribute to a very special Chicago icon, Revolutionary War hero, Casimir Pulaski!

Tune in to learn Chicago's fastest-growing dance craze, the Pulaski Promenade, and hear Glenbrook North High School freshman Zoe Dunkle's award-winning Pulaski essay. Off-Loop regulars Kristopher Kriss and Danny Fine debut their theatrical interpretation of Polish history. And we reminisce about the good ol' days through the eyes of former Major League Baseball star, José Conseco.

Schadenfreude—But we don't want to name names.

Special thanks to Eric Rudd, Mary Gaffney, Colleen Jungbluth, and Jeff Kamien.

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 41
The Year of the Schad

Originally broadcast January 9, 2005

Special Guest: Astrology Singer-Songwriter Harvey Sid Fisher

Hey, what's your sign?

Tune in to Schadenfreude as we explore the 12 signs of the zodiac. Fifty-third Ward alderman Ed Bus's wife Dorse visits a psychic, and Susan and Jaime try to “Repair the Affair.” We also witness a blooming relationship between a telemarketer and a lonely secretary and find ourselves hot on the trail of the infamous Zodiac Killer.

Schadenfreude—I am SUCH a Leo.

Special thanks to Chicago Public Radio's Sylvia Ewing and Melba Lara

 

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Listen to Audio Episode 40
We Apologize in Advance

Originally broadcast December 19, 2004

Every week, we here at Schadenfreude receive numerous responses to our program. Until now, it's been our naive policy to open, read, and file these appraisals into our “Don't Care” folder. But this week, we finally agree with you. We have reviewed the show in question and will bring you a re-edited, remixed version. Episode 39 has been removed from our archives.

So tune in and enjoy some satirical song-and-dance numbers by the Konstitutional Kaperz; eavesdrop on a smoke break with our coworker, Angry Bob Hope; and keep quiet in the courtroom as we put pop culture on trial. All this plus an overnight review of the guy who sings in the subway.

Schadenfreude—Tim Pritchard, we really are very sorry.

Special thanks to Chicago Public Radio's Eric Rudd

 

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  Episode 39
Audio Unavailable
 
   
Listen to Audio

Episode 38
Largely Based on the Theme of Winning

Originally broadcast December 12, 2004

We all love to win, right?

Join us this week for 53rd Ward assistant press secretary/media relations liaison/intern Jason Challenger's move to the big city. We also visit former Phudie Mart general merchandise manager Brent Wickerman at home, test your knowledge of some classic '80s movies, and find out if Schadenfreude can find a way to save its studio.

Schadenfreude—there's no easy way out!

 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 37
We Now Return to Our Regularly-Scheduled Programming
Originally broadcast November 14, 2004
Special Guest: Former WCKG and WDRV DJ Allan Stagg

This week, join legendary Chicago DJ Allan Stagg as he spins 30 minutes of classic Schadenfreude.

We visit Kat McKennit and her mom in the 53rd Ward, hear a rare live performance from Schadenfreude's French collection, find out what really happens when parties get busted, and gear up for the new network reality show, Witch Factor.

Schadenfreude—taste the grizzly. Roaaarrrrrrrrr!
 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 36
The Phudie Mart

Originally broadcast November 7, 2004

What goes on behind the counters of your neighborhood corner store?

This week, Schadenfreude explores the Fifty-third Ward's local grocery: the Phudie Mart. Following the cast of characters both in- and outside of work, we paint an audio portrait of Phudie employees Tony Smalek, Virginia “Slim” Castellano, and Brent Wickerman. No Peabody Award-winning documentary has ever gone this far, this deep, this dirty.

So find a good parking spot, check the sale flyer, and take a good look around you. They may look like regular grocery store employees, but far from it: they're managers.

Schadenfreude—thump it and smell the rind.

Special thanks to Chicago Public Radio's Amy Dorn and Melba Lara.

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 35
Electioneering

Originally broadcast October 31, 2004
Special Guests: Reverend Jesse Jackson; Illinois state senator Barack Obama; Congressman Jesse Jackson, Jr.; Congresswoman Jan Schakowsky; Former U.S. senator Carol Moseley Braun; Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me! host Peter Sagal; and Chicago Public Radio's Carlos Hernandez Gomez

This week, Schadenfreude sets all comedy aside to bring you a special, one-hour program on the 2004 election—offering objective, humorous insight and impartial, comic understanding at this crucial time in our country's history.

We take you to an election-themed Halloween party, investigate terrorist “chatter,” probe deep inside the mind of Karl Rove, and say goodbye to our favorite sitcom—Eight Simple Rumsfeld Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter.

And did we mention the Fox News parody?

Schadenfreude—If it quacks like a duck...

Special thanks to Kevin Lampe, Kitty Kurth, Santita Jackson, Rick Bryant, Leslie Combs, and Julian Green
 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 34
Big Dig

Originally broadcast October 17, 2004

Lights...camera...archaeology!

Join Schadenfreude this week to explore the phenomenon of academic celebrity.

Can PR maven Gail Britt take profs to the “next level?” Can a mom get her son to take off his suit of armor? Ladies, can Dr. Tina save your life? And if you've tried disciplining your children using the fear of God...how 'bout the fear of a volcano?

Schadenfreude—Diiiiiggg!

Special thanks to Chicago Public Radio's Eric Rudd

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 33
Diner
Originally broadcast October 10, 2004

When is a diner just a diner? And when is a francheesie just a francheesie? Join Schadenfreude this week as we ensconce ourselves in the world of booths, bright neon, and all-day breakfast.

We stalk Glass. We talk smack. We buy the diner, then rebuild it.

We also tell party stories, eavesdrop on engagement worries, and hope our toothless waiter comes by to give us a refill.

One diner. One half-hour. About eight sketches.

Schadenfreude—Can I top that off for ya?

Special thanks to Chicago Public Radio's Eric Rudd
 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 32
Reign

Originally broadcast October 3, 2004
Special Guest: Meteorologist Harry Volkman

This weekend is one of the last “outdoor” weekends of the year. So take advantage of the good weather and get out all your fun before winter falls. But what happens if it rains? It pours.

Join Schadenfreude as we take the fun indoors and make the best of a bad situation. We go ringside for the Alderman Ed Bus Family Olympics, sit patiently through a rain delay at Wrigley, and plot out how to get on the field at the Cell. We also go deer-hunting, track down Charles Bronson, and witness the terrible things that happen when you play in the rain.

Schadenfreude—the sun'll come out tomorrow. But for now, be afraid. Be very afraid.

Special thanks to Sam Hallgren
 
 
Listen to Audio

Episode 31
These Are the People in My Neighborhood

Originally broadcast September 26, 2004

You know that skanky Bennigan's across the street from the Art Institute? That's part of the 53rd.
—Alderman Ed Bus (D-53rd)

We kick off a brand-new season of Schadenfreude with a day in the life of one of Chicago's finest neighborhoods: the 53rd Ward. Alderman Ed Bus and the rest of the Schadenfreude gang help you find a new condo, take you to the Actors' Center for the Live Performance of the Dramatic Arts Center, and bring you some high-flying excitement at the annual 16-inch softball game. Can you say, “Watch the face?”

Schadenfreude—you could be our neighbor.

Special thanks to Chicago Public Radio's Eric Rudd

 
 
Listen to Audio

Episode 30
The Concept Album

Originally broadcast June 20, 2004

Schadenfreude steps aside this week to take you back to the glory days of rock 'n' roll radio! In the 1970s, true DJs would spin what they wanted to spin, and they would play full records—both sides.

So in the spirit of those rock pioneers, we're playing BOTH sides of the best album ever, the most complete, artistic record of all time—Abbey Road by the Beatles.

Chicago Public Radio: “Excuse me, guys, but isn't Abbey Road 47 minutes long, while your show's only half an hour?”

Um, well...we'll think of something.

SchadenfreudeAbbey Road in double-time.

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 29
What's in Your Closet?
Originally broadcast June 13, 2004

Schadenfreude asks the million-dollar question: “Name something you'd find in the closet.” Our own closet includes hangers, shoes, and a ton of judgment. We also explore Chicago's 'zine culture and dance a jig and win a Tony with the city's longest-running musical, O'Hare.

Schadenfreude—figments of your imagination and manifestations of your low self-esteem.

Thanks to Chicago Public Radio's Eric Rudd for engineering the live segments of this show

 
 
Listen to Audio

Episode 28
The Golden Age of Radio

Originally broadcast June 6, 2004
Special Guest: Former NPR® Host Bob Edwards

Remember the “Golden Age of Radio?” Schadenfreude doesn’t, but we’ll try our best to recreate it for you. Join us this week for some classic entertainment by Quack the Duck, Winchester, and the Strom Thurmond Orchestra. We also teach you about the dos and don’ts of dating, attend a Pre-Cana session, and bring you another mini-episode of the Phuuuuudiiieeeeee Marrrrrrttttttttt.

And have we mentioned that Bob Edwards stops by?

Schadenfreude—“I rescind that last comment!” (Insert canned 1940s radio audience laughter)

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 27
The Lost Episode

Originally broadcast May 23, 2004

“I once was lost, but now I'm found.”

Oh, no—Schadenfreude has been locked in the basement!  So in the glorious tradition of sitcom retrospective shows and other television hijinx, we bring you this week's episode in the form of flashbacks and foreshadowing.  Join us as we dissect the warnings of legendary predictor Lollagher, attend a 53rd Ward community meeting about permit parking, and take a look at the history of the Chicago theater company, Something Positive.

Schadenfreude—it's not your fault...well, yes it is.

 
 
Listen to Audio

Episode 26
Live from the Tourist Trap II: The Legend of Curly's Gold

Originally broadcast May 9, 2004

This week, Schadenfreude ventures out of its cave and back in front of a live audience. Join us for another episode from Chicago Public Radio’s performance studio right here on Navy Pier.

But what about the show? We go to a MoveOn.org fundraiser to hear the acoustic stylings of the liberal left, find ourselves in the middle of an aldermanic press conference, and once again ask Jesus what he would do.

Schadenfreude—come sail away, come sail away, come sail away from our closed borders!

Special thanks to Chicago Public Radio's Eric Rudd for engineering this show

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 25
Bureaucracy Rocks

Originally broadcast April 25, 2004

This week, Schadenfreude comes to you wrapped in miles and miles of red tape, as we leave the Phudi Mart in search of greener, corporate pastures via Monster.com. We also listen in as a well-known Chicago film critic drags and drops a movie review, and we negotiate the I-PASS lanes of life. And ever wonder what happened to the guys who manned the Kansas missile silos?

Schadenfreude—where bureaucracy rocks.

 
 
Listen to Audio

Episode 24
Wasting Away in Naperitaville

Originally broadcast April 4, 2004

What is a local joke? This week, Schadenfreude proves that there is more to the local reference than a random street name in Chicago. How about a random street name in Naperville?

Schadenfreude invades the sometimes-second-largest city in Illinois (sometimes not) to lampoon, parody, and poke fun. Listen in as we explore the bright lights of Naperville Road, go to the opening of a new theme restaurant, play “headshot poker” with the top theater directors in town, and create a new anthem for Naperville.

Schadenfreude—wasting away in Naperitaville.

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 23
CYOA

Originally broadcast March 28, 2004

Every week, Schadenfreude gives you a choice: you can listen a) Sunday night at 8:30 pm on your radio or b) Monday on your computer. But no matter which option you choose, this week we take you on a walking tour of Lincoln Park Zoo. We also stop by Rich White High School's Spring Fling and send one of our production assistants to a bachelor party. Plus, Chicago's Pigeon Poop Patrol is downsized, and we ask, “What would Jesus do?”

Schadenfreude—the choice is yours.

 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 22
There Goes the Neighborhood

Originally broadcast March 14, 2004

Celebrate Schadenfreude's celebration of diversity. We dive headfirst into the FCC-Clear Channel debate, get endorsements for the Illinois primary elections, and eavesdrop on Mark's ill-fated relationship with an R&B singer. Throw in the touch of an angel and the Battle for Middle Chicago, and you've got yourself a show!

Schadenfreude—leavin' (leavin') on a midnight train to Georgia...without the Pips.
 
   
Listen to Audio

Episode 21
I Love a Parade

Originally broadcast February 29, 2004

Schadenfreude brings you exclusive coverage of Chicago's first annual Leap Year Parade. Don't miss the sights and visionary delights of floats from the Illinois Film Office (scaled down), to 53rd Ward aldermanic candidate Gretchen Ross-Stevenson (made of really expensive flowers), and to Glenbrook North High School (the award winning "Don't Haze" design featuring new student body president Zoe Dunkel). All that plus a few words from our friends at the Foundation for Fighting Natural Causes and a retrospective look at the breakup of a legendary used car partnership.

Schadenfreude: located at York and Roosevelt roads, where you always make more money.

 
   
Listen to Audio

Episode 20
Run, Hanner, Run

Originally broadcast February 22, 2004

Continue following the twists and turns of Schadenfreude by writing your feelings down in your anger diary and keeping your mini-fridge stocked with Diet Coke. If you're sick and tired of holding your parking spot with a piece of furniture, why not borrow an Ed Bus Tumbler to do it instead? And of course, if you're a fan of radio drama, you won't want to miss Craig Beatty's masterpiece Dumb Play I Had to Do.

Take a deep breath and write it down—Schadenfreude.

 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 19
Schad Forty-Eight

Originally broadcast February 15, 2004

Tune in to Chicago's premier radio magazine, Schad Forty-Eight, as we present the stories and sounds of a city on the go. We'll bring you an in-depth interview with author J. D. Salinger and send our crack consumer unit out on the prowl. Plus beauty pageant coaches, this week on Schad Forty-Eight.
 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 18
Caucus!

Originally broadcast January 25, 2004

Join Schadenfreude this week to explore the inner workings of the
American political system.

Schadenfreude:
What sketches should we do?
Caucus:
Do one about Colin Powell!
Yeah, Colin Powell!
Colin Powell!
Schadenfreude:
Any others?
Caucus:
A sketch about a game show!
Game show!
Game show!
Schadenfreude:
Last call?
Caucus:
Whatever one person yells out,
we yell out, too!
Whatever that guy just said!
 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 17
My Kind of Town

Originally broadcast January 11, 2004

The beautiful city of Chicago has everything you'll ever need: hot
dogs, Lake Michigan, O'Hare Airport...and the Bears.

It's the City That Works.

But look closer within the fading walls of Fort Dearborn, and you'll find the city's unsung heroes. This week on "Schadenfreude," listen in on a conversation between two El conductors. Learn more about the heart and soul of Mayor Daley's Graffiti Blasters. And find out what 53rd Ward Alderman Ed Bus must do when he faces a budgetary shortfall in his re-election campaign.

Will he cut his marketing budget?

Or will he fire his best friend?

Tune in as we take you on a journey through Chicago—presenting
completely factual stories about people you've never heard of and
probably never will again.

 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 16
Yes, Virginia, There Is a Schadenfreude

Originally broadcast December 14, 2003
Special Guest: WTTW Channel 11 host and producer Geoffrey Baer

As we prepare our homes and hearts for a warm holiday season, we're reminded of the simple pleasures of life: folk singers, Chicago politics, and $20 DVD players at a Wal-Mart in Tennessee.

This week, Schadenfreude rounds out their pre-holiday fanfare as Alderman Ed Bus discusses winter eats and restaurants on an Emmy Award-winning public television show and we go skiing with Chicago's vibrant off-Loop theater scene. Skiing?

Buy lots of presents to fuel the economy!
Drink lots of egg nog and avoid your Uncle Earl!
And deck the halls with Schadenfreude!
Fa La La La Laaaaa La La La La!

(Was that the right number of La's?)
 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 15
Where Have All the Meatheads Gone?

Originally broadcast December 7, 2003

We all know that Sundays in the fall bring cold air, hot chili, warm couches, and lots and lots of football! And when football season heats up, Schadenfreude Action Sports is on the air!

This episode brings you the high-flying, bone-crushing sketch comedy you've come to expect from the Monsters of Navy Pier. Tune in for the pre-game show to hear an important business call from Duraflame account manager Todd Voorhies, and eat chicken wings and nachos with your favorite reality show host. As the players hit the field, Schadenfreude goes on a first date, presents Kat McKennit at Chicago's finest indoor beach, and debuts a documentary on the wild kingdom of Lincoln Park.

All this with up-to-the-minute analysis from the Schadenfreude Action Sports Team—including John Madden, an XFL cheerleader, and a random comedian making fun of Dennis Miller!

 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 14
Live from the Tourist Trap!

Originally broadcast November 23, 2003

This week, Schadenfreude comes to you live (okay, live-to-tape) from Chicago Public Radio's Performance Studio at beautiful Navy Pier. To secure the space, we agreed to allow Navy Pier to use this webpage for a brief plug. Take it away, Navy Pier!

3...2...1...LAUNCH!

WE ARE A GO FOR A SUPER-FUN TIME!

Having undergone a massive renovation, Navy Pier has established itself as Chicago's premier one-stop entertainment venue. Navy Pier offers chocolate, state-of-the-art convention facilities, hard candy, an enormous ferris wheel, sour candy, and crazy guys who love to juggle!

From fried shrimp at the one-of-a-kind Bubba Gump Shrimp Company to double “cheezborgers” at the original Billy Goat Tavern, Navy Pier brings you fun and laughs for children and adults alike. Wanna ride on a spaceship? Stroll along the lake to the sounds of Billy Ocean? Cruise the waves on the super-fast and super-rad Sea Dog? Consider it done!

Come see what the city's raving about!

 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 13
The Writing's on the Wall

Originally broadcast November 9, 2003

Last week, Schadenfreude received some strange news: we were instructed to avoid writing, recording, and producing a 13th episode.

“No hotel has a 13th floor,” they said, “and all radio shows avoid airing a 13th episode. They just go straight to 14.”

“No, they don't,” we replied.

“YES, THEY DO!” they shouted.

“Don't shout,” we said. “Let's just talk like regular people for two seconds.”

“But aren't you superstitious?” they cried.

Hmmm...not really, we thought. For the last five years, we've been killing spiders, walking under ladders, and buying as many black cats as pet stores can stock. We love black cats—can't get enough of 'em.

Special thanks to Damien Arnold

 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 12
Under New Management
Originally broadcast November 2, 2003

Greetings!

Welcome to Schadenfreude's 12th episode.

A short month ago, Schadenfreude was sold to a new parent company
through a complicated process of bartering and acquisition. Though the
individuals overseeing the oversight (or "the man," as the Schadenfreude members would probably say) have changed, this transition will in no way affect the overall style, tone, or scope of the sketch comedy show you enjoy every Sunday night.

But...there will be some changes! Over the past month, you've received
comment cards to complete and return to the Schadenfreude offices.
Though we haven't actually read your comments, we get the general idea—something needs to change!

So, by golly, we're gonna make some changes!

For example, all music cues have been eliminated from the show to
provide you with a more balanced and less “intrusive” listening
experience. Same goes for sound effects. We've also made the very
tough, yet bold decision to cease and desist any and all political
satire. Rest easy, Mayor Daley—we're done! Kaput! No more jokes
about “Wards” (what is a “Ward,” anyway?) or commemorative street names or even Fort Dearborn.

If you have any questions or concerns, please call us anytime at a new
number that you'll receive under separate cover. Our DSL line has been
down for a few months—Rome wasn't built in a day, people! Ha ha! (We should put that in the show! Wait! WE CAN!)

Thank you for listening, and What You Get!

Warm Regards,
Schadenfreude

 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 11
Call the Number on Your Screen
Originally broadcast October 19, 2003
Special Guests: Comedian Dave Foley and real estate agent Chaz Walters

Tune in for a very special, super-sized, hour-long, must-see-I-mean-listen-to Schadenfreude!

As we approach the season of giving, it's important to start giving
back to your community. So call the station to support Chili Bone
Uh-Huh's upcoming performance at the Kingston Mines! Make a donation to the campaign to re-elect Alderman Ed Bus, or sponsor one of the famed Ed Bus Tumblers! For just pennies a day, you can keep veteran journalist Halston Yearnley on the streets. Sending kids to college? Not to worry! You can transfer your beloved children to another university and apply the balance of their tuition to finance Bob Childers's upcoming "Pig in a Blanky" tour!

Tune in and support Schadenfreude!

What could be more fun?

We took care of the trash, didn't we?

Operators are standing by...

 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 10
Live at the Acropolis! Wait...I mean the Metropolis.
Originally broadcast October 12, 2003

Schadenfreude comes to you LIVE! Wait. The show was live, but it was taped in front of a live studio audience. We'll take the tape of the live show and broadcast it on Sunday as if it were actually live. Cool?

Let's start again. This week, Schadenfreude comes to you LIVE FROM A TAPE OF A LIVE SHOW at the Metropolis Performing Arts Centre! Just like Cheers, Schadenfreude was taped in front of a live studio audience. See? It's okay that it was taped. But it really was live!

Need proof? Go ahead, click here>>

Listen as your favorite sketches, characters, situations, plots, plot points, bits, sound cues, music transitions, and interactions are presented onstage. In front of real people. No kidding.

Just wait...

And don't forget to vote Daley. what you got
 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 9
Is This Show Killing You?
Originally broadcast September 28, 2003

Do you really want to know what time Schadenfreude airs?
Do you really care that the show airs at 8:30 pm?
Is this website harmful to your eyes?
Does typing on a keyboard cause carpal tunnel syndrome?
Does sitting on a chair cause loss of blood flow to the legs and
metatarsals?
Are your children suffocating...right now?
Are maps hazardous to your sense of direction?
Is Jim Zulevic dangerous to your sense of well-being?
Do your parents really have your best interests in mind?
Mice.
Lice.
Shampoo can contain living microbes from both mice and lice.
Could Web site links cause asthma?
Are performance artists blurring the line between pretension and
arrogance?
Do you really want to listen to Schadenfreude?
Do you even have a radio?
Do you know that your radio could be KILLING YOU?

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 8
If You Share Your Files, You’re a Terrorist
Originally broadcast September 14, 2003
Special Guest: Musician and record producer Steve Albini

In this episode, Schadenfreude™ presents material that has been copywritten©, registered®, trademarked™, and patented©®™ through a number of government agencies...

The hottest producer in Los™ Angeles™ describes her love of the movies©, Tad the Eternal Grad Student© waxes through his copy of Germinal®, and the cast™ discovers a brand-new method of weight loss™.

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 7
Schadenfreude Presents Schadenfreude Presenting Schadenfreude
Originally broadcast September 7, 2003
Special Guests: WTTW Channel 11's John Callaway and Phil Ponce, Chicago Sun-Times columnist Laura Washington, Sports Illustrated legal analyst Lester Munson, and Chicago Tribune columnist Eric Zorn

To begin at the beginning...

This is a show within a show within a show within a show as initially described on a website within a website launched and maintained by Chicago Public Radio to support Schadenfreude, a show whose afore mentioned episode can best be described as a show within a show within a show as initially described on a website within a website launched and maintained by Chicago Public Radio to support Schadenfreude, a show whose afore mentioned episode can best be described as a show within a show within a show within a show.

To begin at the beginning...

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 6
The Bourgeois Pig Is Not Just a Coffee Shop in Lincoln Park
Originally broadcast August 17, 2003
Special Guests: University of Illinois, Chicago, distinguished professor of education Bill Ayers and WGN Channel 9 chief meteorologist Tom Skilling

Now let's take a look at our weekend forecast. Weatherman Tom Skilling's outlook is partly cloudy with scattered social unrest. But what's the weather underground? If the coast if clear, '60s radical Bill Ayers might show up.
 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 5
Bell Biv de Freude
Originally broadcast August 3, 2003

Hey baby,
I’m sorry.
I never meant to hurt you.
I still love you, baby.
You hear me?
Huh?
Right there . . . did you hear that?
You hear me talkin’ to ya?
I still got a lot of love for you.
Cause you’re my baby.
And you make me wanna sing . . .

Tune in Sunday night!
Time for Schadenfreude!
‘Cause it’s so sooooo sooooooooo
Tune in Sunday night!
Time for Schadenfreude!
I’m in love, love, looooooooooooove . . .

 
   
Listen to Audio Episode 4
I Taped It Off of Kings of Queen
Originally broadcast July 27, 2003
Special Guest: Chicago Public Radio's Gretchen Helfrich

GO! Hurry up! You’re almost there! Tune in on Sunday night to listen to episode four of Schadenfreude! Move it, move it, move it! First you have to maneuver through the resurrection of an '80s classic game show, but before you’re done, you’ll have to go to Navy Pier with Mark Hanner for a strange encounter; visit a live performance of Chili Bone Uh-Huh in a Chicago bar; WAIT! NOT THAT WAY! BACK UP! BACK UP! There you go! After you leave the Senator’s election night party, ask yourself, “How Hard Can It REALLLLY Be?;” dive into the big green mushy pool of goop; and if you do that, if you DO ALL THAT, our friend Gretchen might just record your voice mail message.

“Hi, this is Gretchen! What you got!”

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 3
The Third Rail
Originally broadcast July 20, 2003

This week we ask you:
Ever question the voltage of that infamous third rail?
Ever wish you knew the name of every train stop in the city?
Ever witness an interrogation by the notorious El Cops?
Ever notice mating patterns in the parks of Wicker and Lincoln?
Ever see a folksinger perform in a church basement?
Ever wonder what happened to Tracy Chapman?
Ever ever ever ever ever?
Hmmm, yeah.
Us too.

 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 2
Gorillas in the Midst...of the People
Originally broadcast July 13, 2003
 
 
Listen to Audio Episode 1
This Is Where the Title of the Show Is Going to Go Every Week, Except for This Week, Because We Had to Tell You Where the Title's Gonna Go
Originally broadcast July 6, 2003

The debut episode begins with a tribute to a famous filmmaker, followed by their brand new theme song and ongoing introductions to everyone at the party. The world famous Konstutional Kaperz return to the stage, Man on the street Mark Hanner develops a new staging of Glengarry Glen Ross, Susan and Jaime host their own television show, and Alderman Ed Bus has a few things to say about Chicago’s 53rd Ward.

Oh, and did we mention Mayor Daley?

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